For fcking better or worse...

This move...sigh...I know, more whining about moving. I'm even tired of it but, alas, it's my party and I'll whine if I want to.

So, you stand before your officiant and take your marriage vows alongside your beloved and you say them...and you really do mean them. And sometimes life hands you shit sandwiches and down the hatch they go and here you are reflecting on your wedding vows because those vows are the only thing keeping you from reaching your arm out 2500 miles and ripping your husband's head off. And I know that this rough patch is probably not the worst we'll see during what I hope will be decades of marriage but this fcking sucks. SO MUCH.

And I am very, very tired of this situation. I am tired of being the only one in charge. I am tired of being the one who makes the phone calls and arrangements for sub-contractors, movers, glass crating companies, realtors, more sub-contractors and various cleaning companies. And I know that these are things that only I can do b/c I am the one who is here to let people in, take measurements, write checks, etc. and goodness knows that Michael is helping as much as he can. But. These are the things that make me long for my single days in a one-bedroom apt with my dog. I just want to crawl in a hole and never come out. Instead, however, I'm going to drag my ass to the post office, the UH@ul store, the hardware store, G00dwill and the Upscale Resale store to drop off donations and go to the bank. And then come home and pack my ass off. Blarg. Hate everything.

More cuteness...

This about cheering me up as much as it is subjecting you to more pictures of my dog. She is so. Freaking. Cute. Totally.



My husband is also really freaking cute. I mean, he's very studly and hot. Yeah, studly and hot.

So much to do and not enough time...

So....I leave the state I've called home for the last 5+ years in 10 days. 10 days. 10 DAYS! I am so not ready. Physically ready, that is. I've put off the remainder of the packing in part b/c we had an open house yesterday and we wanted it to still be "staged" but now the furious packing must begin. I'm struggling with this b/c I know that I have 2 smallish suitcases out of which I will live until the 15th and I just don't know what I'm going to need and I can't make myself think that far ahead.

In the meantime, I'm trying to say my goodbyes and that's hard to do. We know we won't be coming back to OH any time soon so unless our friends and family come to see us in Cali we won't be seeing anyone for a long time.

And yet I feel a bit anxious to get the heck out of dodge. I just want to be with my husband and my dog and I no longer care much about anything else. I want to get back to some semblance of "normal" and the only way to do that is to be with my beloved and our mutt. But it's only 10 more days. 10 days. That's going to go by quickly.

Bittersweet...

I've spent the last 8 weeks cursing this house as we've readied it for sale with help from our parents...and now, all I want to do is cry.

A message from my dog...

Where is the Short One who feeds me and walks me and rubs my ears just the way I like? It's Tall Man, Tall Man, Tall Man all the time here...where the hell are we, anyway? Can you believe these people stuck me in a car for 4 days while they drove us past some dirt and rocks and shit?!? Unbelievable. And the Short One was always turning around in her seat to take pictures of me while I tried to sleep. Bitch. Oh, and she's always coming after me with a kleenex in her hand and wiping my eyes. I hate that. And now the Tall Man does it. I'm hungry. I think I'll go bark at a cat that's outside some 3 blocks away. Yeah, and then I'll go sleep under the bed. I wonder what happened to the Short One...? Rub my belly.

A recap of the trip to Cali....

It's been a week since my return to Ohio and I finally got the pics off the digital camera so that I might post them for your enjoyment. I will let Michael give you the down and dirty details of our crazy adventures with a mechanic in Utah that we will call "Cletus."

The trip started with breakfast at our favorite place. I had the pancakes and Michael had eggs and the french (that's right, french toast, not fcking "freedom" toast) toast. And, of course, there was lots of coffee.

And then we went home, loaded up the car and the dog and headed west. We talked and sang along to CDs and took turns petting the dog. We stopped in St. Louis to see the Arch. That's Michael and Esme down there. They are so tiny.



Esme had to use the facilities at the Arch:



We stopped that night in Kansas City, MO b/c I just couldn't drive another hour. I was so pooped out that as soon as we checked in to our hotel I was asleep in bed. And my wonderful husband took our mutt outside for last pee pee so that I could remain passed out in bed.

The next morning we crossed the state line into Kansas about 20 minutes into our drive. This is a wind farm in Kansas (plus some glare from the window--Angie and Joel I am not):


After...how shall I say....an unbelievably horrifying drive thru the Rockies at night (my husband is lucky there wasn't a divorce lawyer handy b/c I thought we were going to die), we woke up to this magnificence:There was more to this post but I seem to have lost it....where have you gone, post? Damn. Okay, will post the sequel to our trip to Cali in another post. But first, is this not beautiful?

Too tired...

To write about our...exciting, nay, death-defying trip to Cali-for-nee-ya. Seriously. There's nothing like being trapped in the desert in Utah on a Saturday afternoon and being told that your alternator is bad. Fck. Alas, everything is fine and I am back in Ohio laying in my bed. Details will be forthcoming soon as well as some photos taken on the road. All is well except that I miss my husband and my dog and that the house we've called "home" for the last 4+ years no longer feels like "home" without them. Sigh...

The Different Fummer takes a road trip...

We're on our way to Cali and will try to post from the road if we aren't too tired. Stay tuned!

Sticker shock...

And we haven't even moved to CA yet. Michael and I are suffering from a little sticker shock for some things we need to do to get our house ready for the market. We had some anticipated expenses like the purchase of more paint, powerwashing our house, tiling our floor in the kitchen, refinishing the stairs and landing on the second floor... but then we've accumulated additional expenses like some electrical work that needs to be done to the tune of $1100. And our realtor suggested new counter tops in the kitchen (yeah, we're going with new laminate instead). Naturally all the stuff that needs to be done by a professional seems to cost something with 4 figures in it. Blarg.

We're fortunate that Michael's new employer has offered such a generous relocation package but it seems we're going to use an awful lot of that money just to get our house ready to be sold. We haven't even finished running the figures for moving and storing all of our belongings. Sigh...

A spot of cuteness...

I am taking a momentary rest from painting and/or packing to bring you this little bright spot in my day...

Reality sets in...

It's been 6 days since we found out we are moving and now reality has set in. Michael and I are feeling positively overwhelmed by everything. And, yes, we know, "do one thing at a time" and all that but there are moments when that doesn't help. Thank goodness I have off from work and school this week b/c I would have been a disaster for sure. My mind is just constantly thinking things that need to be fixed, packed, sold, moved, given away, cleaned, etc. that it's hard to keep them all straight sometimes. To combat this issue, Michael and I are using google docs to help keep everything in order. Thank goodness for the internets.

The hardest part so far has been watching how sad this move makes my husband. I know he's excited about this really freakin' awesome job he got but he's a family guy and I know it pains him to move so far away from them. The second hardest part has been contemplating my return to this house with neither husband nor dog in tow. It reminds me so much of when my mom and brother moved to the Chicago-area after graduation but I returned to Lanky-town for 6 weeks to finish my scholarship obligation. Plus I was living by myself in a house with no furniture and only a few dishes and it was just weird. This time Grandma won't be packing every last dish until it's time to put everything on the moving truck:> It's a bittersweet time to be sure.

So, enough moping. Must get dressed and start painting. And do some more laundry. And meet with our realtor. And keep my sanity.

The big news!

At last! Michael accepted a job at a lovely robotics company (musn't say the name lest we be dooced) in Sunnyvale, CA near San Jose. We're moving him and the dog at the end of April and I will be returning to finish the spring quarter at school and get our house packed and ready for sale. More news to come soon! A job! Finally! California! Moving! Aack!

5 years later...

Okay, I meant to post this last month but what can I say? I'm a procrastinator and busy as hell.

5 years ago I moved to Ohio from Lanky-town and a whole crazy lot has happened. Let's review:

• I moved into my first "big girl" apartment where I lived (blessedly) alone with my 4-legged companion
• I was adopted by my awesome friend Marg, who introduced me to the city and to internet dating and has made my life in OH way more entertaining than it otherwise might have been
• I tried internet dating. All in all, a fairly good experience as far as dating goes and that's how I met my wonderful and amazing husband
• I met Michael in Jan '04 and here we are happily married for over 2 years. We have a very nice life (albeit a tad stressful at the mo'), a beautiful home and each other.
  
• We also have a mortgage and HELOC debt, we've put 2 dogs to sleep and adopted a third, deal regularly with crazy family member issues and struggle to keep our sanity while Michael looks for a job
• I realized along the way that non-profit organizations are every bit as soul sucking as for-profit companies but without the salary and benefits package, bonuses and extra PTO that for-profits often provide. We're expected to pay our bills with warm fuzzies instead.
• Oh, yes. My parents got divorced somewhere in there. I almost forgot that one.
• I quit my "real" job and took a waitressing gig while going to nursing school.
  
• Realized the life plan I had when I came out here 5 years ago is nothing like real life as it has unfolded.

So, it's been a busy 5 years and it's turned out very differently than expected. Not in a bad way, mind you, just different. I never thought I would have stayed in OH for longer than 3 years and I had no hope of meeting the man who would become my husband. And I definitely never thought I'd have to put by baby girl to sleep anytime soon. But here I am and here we are.
We're facing a lot of uncertainty until Michael gets a new job and then we'll be off on some new adventure. Stay tuned....

Memoir in six words....

Work in progress..much to do.

Be sure to go to Salon.com to see what others had to say.

Aack (and why we should support universal health care)...

In an effort to make good on one of my new year's resolutions, I dragged my husband upstairs for some quality time and in return I got a UTI. And I come to the realization that, yes, it is a UTI at about 2:30 on a Saturday in the middle of a continuous lunch rush at work and after my doctor has closed up shop for the day. And because I had to work a double shift and it was one of those days where the customers never stop coming in, I had to wait until 9:30 at night to get myself to urgent care before they closed at 10. Of course the Cipro I have to take gives me a yeast infection so between the fee to go to urgent care and the 3 meds I'm now taking, I racked up $100 in fees in a very short period of time. Plus there's always the possibility of having to go see my GP after all because I'm developing a rash on my arm that wasn't there prior to taking the antibiotic. Blarg. Did I mention that the Cipro caused a yeast infection? Yeah.

Despite my annoyance at all of this I recognize how lucky I am to have health insurance (even tho I'm really pissed at my provider at the moment) and to have a manager who was kind enough to let me go to urgent care even tho I hadn't finished my side work. Despite the fact that the company I work for provides insurance coverage, almost none of the employees participate--mostly b/c they can't afford the premiums. Many of them have been sick with colds, flu and various infections during the past 6 weeks and b/c they lack insurance coverage and don't have the money to go to urgent care they get so sick that they end up in the ER. Or they continue to come to work and cough and hack all over the place (hello people--we serve food here--stop coughing on everything). So, for all those people out there who don't think we need universal health care coverage just remember: when you go out to eat, your server is probably too poor to afford a doctor's office visit plus the cost of a prescription and he/she is the last person to touch your food before you eat it. There are many reasons to support universal health care and I'm just offering up one more. Seriously, the time is now.

1. What did you do in 2007 that you'd never done before?

Quit my job and just be a student for 4 whole months (thanks to my husband).

2. Did you keep your new year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

No and No. I continued to use my cell phone while driving and I did not have more sexy time with my husband. Boo. Although I did return to flossing regularly after my braces were removed.

This year's resolutions are to have more sexy time with my husband, limit cell phone use while driving and contact my elected officials at least once a month.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Yes!

4. Did anyone close to you die?

Yes, see previous post.

5. What countries did you visit?

Sadly, none, but Michael promised me a trip to Ireland as a graduation present (which is still about 2 years away).

6. What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?

More self-discipline. Oh, and to know where my husband is going to be gainfully employed for the forseeable future and whether or not that job requires an out-of-state move. That's all I'm asking for...please?

7. What dates from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

Dec. 27th--see previous post.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

I spent the year as a student, employee (except for those 4 wonderful months) and spouse and managed to get good grades, bring home the bacos and hold my shit together (for the most part). Of course, all of this is thanks to my husband for making it possible.

9. What was your biggest failure?

Allowing myself to be bullied by my former boss and not quitting my job sooner. What was I thinking?

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Nope, thankfully.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

A new dog. Esme is a wonderful companion.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

My husband's. And my in-laws'.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

Too many to name.

14. Where did most of your money go?

Into various retirement accounts, utility bills, our mortgage, textbooks. Blarg. Not enough went to a nice vacation abroad.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Harry Potter!

16. What song will always remind you of 2007?

Too many damn Top 40 songs played at the restaurant where I work.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

a) happier or sadder? Both but mostly happier.
b) thinner or fatter? the same.
c) richer or poorer? poorer for sure.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?

Having sexy time with my husband. See my friends more often. Read more books that weren't text books.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?

Freaking out about work and my grades.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?

We spent X-mas at our house with my mom and grandmother. It was a little too much togetherness time but we had fun.

23. What was your favorite TV program?

House, of course. And the Simpson's and Family Guy.

25. What was the best book you read?

The Kite Runner.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?

I didn't have one. Sad.

27. What did you want and get?

Accepted to nursing school (although technically I didn't find that out until 2008).

28. What did you want and not get?

A cool job for my husband located in a cool city.

29. What was your favorite film of this year?

The Simpson's Movie.

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

30, and I didn't do much. I wasn't up to celebrating at the time but maybe I'll do something more exciting for 31.

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

A cool job for my husband in a cool city and spending more time with my girlfriends.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?

Jeans and ________. As a student I don't have to dress up.

33. What kept you sane?

You know who you are.

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Daniel Craig after seeing "Casino Royale." Rrrowwwrrrrrr.

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007.

Don't waste time on things like anger and worrying. Take action when and if you can and if you can't, find something more useful upon which to focus.

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

Beans, beans
They're good for your heart....

For better or for worse...

And in this case it was for worse. But before I get to that I really must acknowledge my husband for the wonderful human being that he is, for being my pillar of strength, for letting me cry all over him and for comforting not just me, but my mom and grandma.

A week ago today we found out that my Aunt Mauna was killed in a car accident in Champaign, IL where she lives. We didn't find out until Friday that the guy who caused the accident was driving drunk and that he had 2 previous DUIs and that he was driving on a revoked license. And that he fled on foot and hid in a drainage ditch and the police had to send a dog in to drag him out. And now that man is in jail and the charges against him come with a 35-year prison sentence.

The funeral service was so nice...so personal...so happy and sad at the same time. We recounted funny memories and we got to see the sides of my aunt's life we didn't know much about as evidenced by the very long line of friends, co-workers, neighbors (and a couple ex-husbands) who arrived at the funeral home to pay their respects. And I got a fit of the inappropriate giggles when my cousin sang a song that was a little out of her range and it reminded me of when my Aunt June sang so horribly at my Aunt Susie's wedding.

Anyway, the whole last week has been spent in shock and in mourning. I slept all day on Tuesday and am just now starting to feel somewhat normal. But it's hard to carry on with normal activities when the loss of a loved one is always in the back of your mind. But I need to, we all need to, because we're still here on this earth. And for better or for worse (hopefully more for the better) we will keep on going...all the while missing our loved ones and every fond memory a celebration of our crazy lives.

Ding, dong the witch is dead...

I mean fired. Neener, neener, neener.

This just goes to show you that sometimes there is justice in this world.

So surreal...

Do you ever have one of those moments where you think to yourself "Did that really just happen?" Michael and I had one of those moments on Friday and I'm still thinking about it.

So, last Friday Michael and I met our dear friend Burt for lunch at this little hole in the wall bar near our house. Some of you might remember Burt from our wedding. He was the short elderly gentleman who kept talking about his "sperm-in-law." Of course, that's a story for another time. Anyway, Burt is an interesting person. He's so nice and so outgoing and just loves talking to people.

Well, we're eating lunch, and Burt's friend David walks in and joins us. He's a doctor with a rehab medicine practice and had recently returned from a trip to Ethiopia (we're not at the surreal part yet). And then Burt asks David if the couple at the table next to us looked familiar. David says that he doesn't recognize them but by then Burt has gone over to them to invite them to join our table.

The couple, Wes and Monica, agree to join us and they pull up some stools from the bar. We're chatting with them for a bit and then Burt asks them how they met. Wes looks at Monica and Monica looks at Wes and they're saying to each other "You tell them." "No, you." "Okay, I'll tell them." Monica tells us that they met in a bar. But Burt decides that their story lacks a little pizazz and that's when Monica says "Actually, I'm a stripper and I always swore I wouldn't do this but I did. I ended up dating a customer." And we all laugh and think "Ha ha--she's so funny!" Except...she wasn't kidding. Um, she really is a stripper. Oh, dear god, she really is a stripper. Hee!

Of course, then we had to talk all about strippers and it was a fascinating conversation. She told us that girls of all shapes and sizes work at the club with her and that she really likes the work. I had to ask about the whole pole dancing thing and she told us that 2 of the poles are stationary but the others are mounted on ball bearings so when you see the girls fling themselves around the poles, they aren't spinning on the pole, the pole is spinning them. Monica, however, eschews the pole because she's afraid she'll hurt herself on it. We had a short discussion on the stripping business (unfortunately no time for feminist discourse) but then it was time for Michael to go back to work and I had to run errands.

But before we go, Burt invites our new...acquaintances?...to our party that we had on Saturday. What the hell? It turns out that Monica and Wes live in our neighborhood so that's cool b/c we love meeting people from our neighborhood but Burt didn't even ask, he just invited these people. So, we left wondering if they would show and, of course, I told half the people at our party about this couple and they never came. But David and his wife Sarah joined us and they were lovely. Everyone at our party was wondering if Sarah was the stripper but, alas, she was not. Anyway, Monica and Wes didn't come to our party but we have an open invitation to come see her here. Apparently they have male strippers on Saturday night.

Our little family...

For those of you who haven't seen our newest 4-legged addition, here she is...

Esme is approximately 3 years old and just a sweet, sweet girl. She can be the devil in disguise so don't let the cuteness fool you. Esme was found abandoned in an empty apartment with 7 one week old puppies and she was brought in to SICSA with pups in tow. The staff helped Esme (then named Nina) with raising her pups and after they were old enough they were all adopted. Only Esme hadn't yet found a family to adopt her but if you ask me, I think it was a little bit of fate on our side that brought us together.

She doesn't like having her picture taken so we don't very many good ones to post yet but I promise we'll put up more soon.