A little bit of success with a dash of fail...
I won't even go into my hard drive crashing last night in the middle of a job app. Or that the repair people aren't sure they can resurrect the damn thing. And that it will cost a couple hundred bucks to find out either way and I *still* need to shell out another hundred for a new hard drive. That or buy a new laptop. Yeah, we're not going to do that. I already promised Michael that he could buy a new laptop as soon as I get a job. *When* I get a job. *If* I get a job. Sheesh.
Anyway, I've been keeping busy with job apps and yard work and cooking and baking my way through about a million bookmarked recipes. Many of my tasty finds can be found over here. There have been trials of really good recipes and then there have been some food fails along the way. Honestly, that doesn't happen very often but when it does, boy, is it spectacular.
Recent fails include a bread recipe and not double checking to make sure I didn't need to grease the loaf pan before putting the dough in it. Oops. I had to pry that sucker out of the pan and then ripped some fairly large chunks out in the process. I was able to salvage almost all of the loaf and it tasted really good so it was okay in the end. Still, a forgetting-to-grease-the-pan-first fail. Bad.
Then there was the lemon bar recipe wherein I wanted to add some blueberries between the shortbread and lemon curd. Except that I didn't think about the moisture content of the berries and did not think to thaw,rinse and drain them first. Oh, shit, this was a massive fail. For one thing, I managed to slop some of the batter onto my oven door and it baked on to the glass. Then, by the time it was cooked through, the curd was overcooked on the top, the middle was this nasty curdled looking purplish stuff and the shortbread just could not be saved. I had to dump the whole thing in the trash and start over. It was even decent enough to take to Michael's office. It looked like the dog's breakfast, as my FIL likes to say.
Today, I had another fail but not one of disastrous proportions. I wanted to get a head start on the luncheon I'm preparing for Michael's birthday next week and I thought I would go ahead and bake the cake and then freeze it until Monday. The recipe I used was fine but I used cake pans that were just a smidge too small and now I have these huge domed cake rounds that are cracked to high heaven. I was planning on making a devil's food cake with choc. buttercream but I think I'm now making chocolate blackout cake. I'm going to cut the top parts of the cake off and break them into small crumbs. After I frost the remaining cake layers, I'll press the cake crumbs into the side and voila! Chocolate blackout cake. Not the end of the world but also not what I was going for. Michael won't care and wouldn't even think anything of it if I hadn't typed it up here for the world to see. At least with this one, I can make lemonade out of my lemons. It's sort of like a mystery fail. No one will know but me.
2.26.2010
Hey, jealousy...
While I am genuinely happy for my classmates who have gotten interviews and the few that have been fortunate enough to get jobs already I can't help but feel a bit jealous. Granted, one of my classmates was already working at a hospital as an ER tech and he had an automatic job as an RN as soon as he got his license. The other one got a job at the nursery in a women's prison but that had as much to do with his background as a social worker as anything else. Bu, still, they have jobs that are local and are contributing to the family income.
Another classmate got a job offer this morning. It's at a SNF...I'm not jealous of the job itself but that she got an offer and I have nothing. Hell, she's never had a job before and I have 10 years of professional experience. Durr. I know, maybe I should just march my ass over to a SNF right now and try to get hired. Except that I know that SNFs can be a dangerous place for RNs and I don't want to lose my license. SNFs are notoriously understaffed and what people don't realize is that LPNs and UAPs (unlicensed assistive personnel) are under the supervision of the RN. If they make a mistake or don't turn a patient who develops some crazy ass decubitus ulcer that rapidly becomes stage IV and starts tunneling, guess whose ass is on the line? Also, hiring managers come right out and tell you they won't hire you if you came from a SNF. But, damn, it feels like being caught between a rock and a hard place. And yet, I'm still jealous. What the hell? This just feels like 2001 all over again.
While I am genuinely happy for my classmates who have gotten interviews and the few that have been fortunate enough to get jobs already I can't help but feel a bit jealous. Granted, one of my classmates was already working at a hospital as an ER tech and he had an automatic job as an RN as soon as he got his license. The other one got a job at the nursery in a women's prison but that had as much to do with his background as a social worker as anything else. Bu, still, they have jobs that are local and are contributing to the family income.
Another classmate got a job offer this morning. It's at a SNF...I'm not jealous of the job itself but that she got an offer and I have nothing. Hell, she's never had a job before and I have 10 years of professional experience. Durr. I know, maybe I should just march my ass over to a SNF right now and try to get hired. Except that I know that SNFs can be a dangerous place for RNs and I don't want to lose my license. SNFs are notoriously understaffed and what people don't realize is that LPNs and UAPs (unlicensed assistive personnel) are under the supervision of the RN. If they make a mistake or don't turn a patient who develops some crazy ass decubitus ulcer that rapidly becomes stage IV and starts tunneling, guess whose ass is on the line? Also, hiring managers come right out and tell you they won't hire you if you came from a SNF. But, damn, it feels like being caught between a rock and a hard place. And yet, I'm still jealous. What the hell? This just feels like 2001 all over again.
2.24.2010
Demoralizing to say the least...
#1) Looking for a job in this market when NO ONE wants to hire new grads. Or they might consider it if they have to but even then they only have one position available. And then spending hours and hours filling out online applications including writing a cover letter and submitting to a mandatory background and credit check and then the website crashing and my computer decides to shut down and install some updates and now my job application is utterly lost as are all the tabs I had open in Firef0x. Sobbing into phone to husband who feels so badly for me he comes home half an hour early and then goes to pick up Chip0tle for dinner. That part was good.
#2) Trying on and purchasing fat smoothing undergarments to wear under the dress I bought for Michael's company holiday party this Saturday. I came home and tried it on under my dress and it looks really nice but, blarg, I hate this kind of stuff. Squishing one's imperfections with crazy undergarments, etc. a la Bridget Jones is occasionally a must if one wants to wear something formfitting. I'm okay with that part. It's the shopping for it that I find so insufferable. For one thing, it feels like you're trying to wriggle into a sausage casing. For another, it was not cheap but on the other hand I'll have it for a long time and can wear it under other dresses when fat smoothing becomes necessary. And, hey, the dress was only $20 and it's really cute.
See that? I'm trying to find some sort of silver lining. I know there are unemployed people out there who have it way worse than I do but I don't live their lives--I live mine--and keeping perspective is harder on some days than on others.
#1) Looking for a job in this market when NO ONE wants to hire new grads. Or they might consider it if they have to but even then they only have one position available. And then spending hours and hours filling out online applications including writing a cover letter and submitting to a mandatory background and credit check and then the website crashing and my computer decides to shut down and install some updates and now my job application is utterly lost as are all the tabs I had open in Firef0x. Sobbing into phone to husband who feels so badly for me he comes home half an hour early and then goes to pick up Chip0tle for dinner. That part was good.
#2) Trying on and purchasing fat smoothing undergarments to wear under the dress I bought for Michael's company holiday party this Saturday. I came home and tried it on under my dress and it looks really nice but, blarg, I hate this kind of stuff. Squishing one's imperfections with crazy undergarments, etc. a la Bridget Jones is occasionally a must if one wants to wear something formfitting. I'm okay with that part. It's the shopping for it that I find so insufferable. For one thing, it feels like you're trying to wriggle into a sausage casing. For another, it was not cheap but on the other hand I'll have it for a long time and can wear it under other dresses when fat smoothing becomes necessary. And, hey, the dress was only $20 and it's really cute.
See that? I'm trying to find some sort of silver lining. I know there are unemployed people out there who have it way worse than I do but I don't live their lives--I live mine--and keeping perspective is harder on some days than on others.
2.18.2010
I remember when...
There was a time when I didn't say things like "I remember when..." like some rambling old person who was born back in the time of Christ. Just kidding, I love me some old people. But really, I think I say "I remember when..." or "When I was in college [the first time]..." way more than I used to.
Technology and tech applications are so different than they used to be. Last night I picked out a new cell phone because I am an idiot and fatally wounded my latest replacement. I told they guy to show me the phones that old people buy. And I was being completely serious. Well, almost. I did pick one of those phones but at least I didn't pick the model with the enormous number buttons. Phones are just so complicated these days. I just want one that calls people and lets me send text messages. And I wasn't eligible for one of the slider phones with the QWERTY keyboard because I refuse to pay for a data plan. Or an increased text messaging plan. Remember when you just made phone calls with your phone? Remember the time before cell phones? Geez, that just seems so long ago.
And then there's the job search. Using the internet is nice in a lot of ways and facilitates the search part but it makes applying for jobs hell on earth. I remember when you printed out your resume, typed up a cover letter and drove over to Kink0's to fax your documents. Now, you apply on line and it takes hours to get through one application process. And, as happened yesterday, I was issued an instantaneous rejection letter via email within seconds of submitting my app. Seconds, people, seconds. That's kind of demoralizing. Sigh...I don't know, it just seems like it shouldn't be this hard of a process nor such a long one. And it makes me long for the days of faxing documents from Kink0's.
There was a time when I didn't say things like "I remember when..." like some rambling old person who was born back in the time of Christ. Just kidding, I love me some old people. But really, I think I say "I remember when..." or "When I was in college [the first time]..." way more than I used to.
Technology and tech applications are so different than they used to be. Last night I picked out a new cell phone because I am an idiot and fatally wounded my latest replacement. I told they guy to show me the phones that old people buy. And I was being completely serious. Well, almost. I did pick one of those phones but at least I didn't pick the model with the enormous number buttons. Phones are just so complicated these days. I just want one that calls people and lets me send text messages. And I wasn't eligible for one of the slider phones with the QWERTY keyboard because I refuse to pay for a data plan. Or an increased text messaging plan. Remember when you just made phone calls with your phone? Remember the time before cell phones? Geez, that just seems so long ago.
And then there's the job search. Using the internet is nice in a lot of ways and facilitates the search part but it makes applying for jobs hell on earth. I remember when you printed out your resume, typed up a cover letter and drove over to Kink0's to fax your documents. Now, you apply on line and it takes hours to get through one application process. And, as happened yesterday, I was issued an instantaneous rejection letter via email within seconds of submitting my app. Seconds, people, seconds. That's kind of demoralizing. Sigh...I don't know, it just seems like it shouldn't be this hard of a process nor such a long one. And it makes me long for the days of faxing documents from Kink0's.
2.15.2010
The struggle to maintain a balanced diet...
Prompted in part by this interesting article on Salon.com today. But then, I regularly think of nutrition and proper eating and getting exercise and the like but some days it's harder than others. Especially since I've entered the unemployed phase (again) of my life. Cooking and baking are among several of my hobbies and since I'm not working, I've been doing more of both. Well, I've been cooking all this time or else we would have eaten little more than Annie's Mac & Cheese, pierogies or Chip0tle. But now I have lots more time to spend in my kitchen and here's a sampling of what I've made: Mississippi Mud Balls, Cherry Chocolate Biscotti, Shortbread Cookies, Lemon Frozen Yogurt, Pecan and Chocolate Covered English Toffee, Granola and Lemon Cake.
Yes, I've cooked food somewhere in there. You know, stuff with vegetables and all. And I sent most of what I baked in to Michael's office and some of it went with Michael when he left to visit his parents. Except the granola. It's in the oven now and it's not leaving this house. Anyway, baking is so much fun and so is tasting what you make. And I am a taster. I taste all the time. That's part of the problem, you see. Then I taste the finished product. And it's always good if I do say so myself. But after the baking is over and the goodies are packed away, they call to me. I can hear them through the tupperware or the freezer or where ever they are stored. And that, my friends, is the problem. That's why this stuff goes to Michael's office.
And then there's the bread making I made as one of my goals for the year. I've baked two batches so far and both were quite good. Both were also made with whole wheat flour. I like wheat bread anyway so that's no sacrifice. But the finished product just tastes so good that I would almost eat it to the exclusion of my dinner. Maybe I need to find some new hobbies that keep me out of the kitchen. Or maybe I need to hang out with Jillian and Bob more often (not like I don't hang out with them enough already). Or maybe I should wear a H@nnibal Lect0r mask while I bake. Or, maybe, I should get a damned job already.
Prompted in part by this interesting article on Salon.com today. But then, I regularly think of nutrition and proper eating and getting exercise and the like but some days it's harder than others. Especially since I've entered the unemployed phase (again) of my life. Cooking and baking are among several of my hobbies and since I'm not working, I've been doing more of both. Well, I've been cooking all this time or else we would have eaten little more than Annie's Mac & Cheese, pierogies or Chip0tle. But now I have lots more time to spend in my kitchen and here's a sampling of what I've made: Mississippi Mud Balls, Cherry Chocolate Biscotti, Shortbread Cookies, Lemon Frozen Yogurt, Pecan and Chocolate Covered English Toffee, Granola and Lemon Cake.
Yes, I've cooked food somewhere in there. You know, stuff with vegetables and all. And I sent most of what I baked in to Michael's office and some of it went with Michael when he left to visit his parents. Except the granola. It's in the oven now and it's not leaving this house. Anyway, baking is so much fun and so is tasting what you make. And I am a taster. I taste all the time. That's part of the problem, you see. Then I taste the finished product. And it's always good if I do say so myself. But after the baking is over and the goodies are packed away, they call to me. I can hear them through the tupperware or the freezer or where ever they are stored. And that, my friends, is the problem. That's why this stuff goes to Michael's office.
And then there's the bread making I made as one of my goals for the year. I've baked two batches so far and both were quite good. Both were also made with whole wheat flour. I like wheat bread anyway so that's no sacrifice. But the finished product just tastes so good that I would almost eat it to the exclusion of my dinner. Maybe I need to find some new hobbies that keep me out of the kitchen. Or maybe I need to hang out with Jillian and Bob more often (not like I don't hang out with them enough already). Or maybe I should wear a H@nnibal Lect0r mask while I bake. Or, maybe, I should get a damned job already.
2.05.2010
Life maintenance part bazillion...
Folks, I am catching up on months of life maintenance here and it feels like I'll never get to the end of the list of things to do. And the list is long. But I am making progress so that's a good thing. In fact, we finally got a major project done and I'm very pleased. We cleaned out our garage and while we'll never be able to park our car in it (almost no one around here parks in their garage--it's like a storage unit attached to your house), we can get to stuff and there's space to spread out laundry baskets and the like.
I'm also working on selling some things. Mostly books from school and a few other things as well. But that is a time suck like I never imagined. It really takes time to sit there a post all these books to am@zon.c0m and then pick a price that isn't too high and not too low. And in an effort to avoid having to ship all of them (there's probably 15 books or so), I'm trying to sell a few of them to the ABSN cohort that started in January. That way all I have to do it drive 30 miles to campus and unload them all at once. I'm still hoping someone might want to buy my scrubs but no word so far on that. Otherwise, those awful things are going in the trash. I don't mind white scrubs per se but these did not fit terribly well, didn't have enough pockets and also have the school's logo on them. As I am no longer a student nurse, I don't intend to dress like one.
All work and no play makes Kelly a dull person so I've been scheduling some fun activities. I met some friends from nursing school for dinner and drinks, Michael and I went to a Super Bowl Top Chef party, I've been reading books (real books for fun!) and we've been watching season 1 of 6 Feet Under. It's been good. The job thing is hanging over my head but I'm giving myself a few more days of decompression and life maintenance before I really kick the search into high gear. But today is about fun. I'm picking up Greg Plotner in the city and we're going to do some sightseeing before he heads to the airport. Today I get to stop and smell the roses and I'm grateful for the opportunity.
Folks, I am catching up on months of life maintenance here and it feels like I'll never get to the end of the list of things to do. And the list is long. But I am making progress so that's a good thing. In fact, we finally got a major project done and I'm very pleased. We cleaned out our garage and while we'll never be able to park our car in it (almost no one around here parks in their garage--it's like a storage unit attached to your house), we can get to stuff and there's space to spread out laundry baskets and the like.
I'm also working on selling some things. Mostly books from school and a few other things as well. But that is a time suck like I never imagined. It really takes time to sit there a post all these books to am@zon.c0m and then pick a price that isn't too high and not too low. And in an effort to avoid having to ship all of them (there's probably 15 books or so), I'm trying to sell a few of them to the ABSN cohort that started in January. That way all I have to do it drive 30 miles to campus and unload them all at once. I'm still hoping someone might want to buy my scrubs but no word so far on that. Otherwise, those awful things are going in the trash. I don't mind white scrubs per se but these did not fit terribly well, didn't have enough pockets and also have the school's logo on them. As I am no longer a student nurse, I don't intend to dress like one.
All work and no play makes Kelly a dull person so I've been scheduling some fun activities. I met some friends from nursing school for dinner and drinks, Michael and I went to a Super Bowl Top Chef party, I've been reading books (real books for fun!) and we've been watching season 1 of 6 Feet Under. It's been good. The job thing is hanging over my head but I'm giving myself a few more days of decompression and life maintenance before I really kick the search into high gear. But today is about fun. I'm picking up Greg Plotner in the city and we're going to do some sightseeing before he heads to the airport. Today I get to stop and smell the roses and I'm grateful for the opportunity.
2.03.2010
2.02.2010
2009 Recap...
As always, I'm late with posting so just ignore the fact that it's Feb. 2nd already. Technically, I started this on Jan. 10th.
1. What did you do in 2009 that you'd never done before?
Attended and graduated from an accelerated bachelors in nursing program. Learning that medicine has to have a special name for every bodily function. You can’t just say nose bleed you have to say “epistaxis.” Bed-wetting is “enuresis.” And gall bladder removal is “cholecystectomy.” I could go on and on about this but nursing school is pretty much all I did during 2009 so we’ll just leave it at that.
2. Did you keep your new year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
They were more like goals than resolutions but I met most of them. My container gardening experiment went south when the damned squirrels started digging up all my plants despite my efforts to fence everything in. Stupid squirrels. I did not manage to make bread from scratch until last weekend and I had a bit of a bread fail. I’ll work on that. And we did go to Hawaii for Christmas, so check!
I did make 2 resolutions for 2010: no talking on the cell phone while driving (not even with my ear bud) and doing less multi-tasking. I make myself nutty with too much multi-tasking so it’s time to cut back a bit.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Yes.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Yes. I don’t want to talk about it.
5. What countries did you visit?
None. Again. But that was expected this year. I did however go to Atlanta and Hawaii and I rather enjoyed myself. Besides, with Hawaii, it feels like you’re going to another county because it’s unlike anywhere in the contiguous U.S. Even Florida. Florida may have palm trees but it does not have huge blobs of lava rock everywhere.
6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
Um, a job? Hello, Universe, it’s me again. I’m unemployed. Again. I need a job. Preferably one in California, please. Also, more time to read. And I don’t just mean textbooks and nursing journals. More Sundays spent reading the NYT drinking coffee with my husband.
7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
There are many but in an attempt to focus on the more positive events, I’ll just note that 1/5/09 was the first day of school and 12/6/09 was my Pinning ceremony and 12/20/09 was my last day of preceptorship at the hospital.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
See #1.
9. What was your biggest failure?
Getting a B+ in Maternity. Ok, really, in the long run, not such a failure. That class was f’ing hard. In the beginning of the year, I had a hard time keeping grades and things in perspective. I started doing a better job of it in the fall. Maybe that had to do with the fact that I was tired of being in school and my can of care was running low.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
2 sinus infections and horrible neck spasms that rendered me pretty helpless while Michael was 2,000 miles away visiting his parents. That sucked.
11. What was the best thing you bought?
Underwear that fits. Brand new sneakers for the first time in 5 years. What was I thinking?
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Michael. He has been a total rock star and I could not have made it through this year without him. Or any year, for that matter. Because he’s awesome.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Well, we finally rid ourselves of Bush but his wrongdoings live on. Also, the Republicans and Joe Fcking Lieberman. Seriously, why are you trying to sabotage health care reform? What the hell is wrong with you?
14. Where did most of your money go?
Since I was unemployed, I did not make any money. :<
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Our vacation. It was long overdue.
16. What song will always remind you of 2009?
I don’t know. I’ll have to think about this one. Probably any song by Lady Gaga because she's always on the radio whenever I switch over to the music stations.
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? about the same
b) thinner or fatter? thinner
c) richer or poorer? I’m, like, negative poor. I’m in debt to the gov’t and the bank. Boo.
18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Leisurely reading but, hey, that was a pipe dream anyway. Unless I could suddenly learn to live on only 4 hours of sleep. Um, yoga. I really should have done more of that. Taking what blessedly few breaks from school that I had and really trying to relax instead of running a mile a minute to do life maintenance. Also, loving on my husband. And I don’t mean just the naked tango, people.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Freaking out about grades. Getting worked up by classmates who cheat because they won’t be able to cheat on the NCLEX. Good luck passing that one. And, as always, worrying. I worry about everything. It’s not always very helpful.
20. How will you be spending did you spend Christmas?
In Hawaii. We went on a walk down the coastline and watched the surfers for a bit. Later we went to a luau and had some pretty tasty food. The poi was okay. Pretty starchy. Also? Mai Tais are good. So is a well made pina colada.
23. What was your favorite TV program?
House. I love me some Hugh Laurie. Also, I particularly enjoy the Daily Show and the Colbert Report. It was easy to watch the occasional 21 min. show on the C C website without commercials. It was a nice little break from studying.
25. What was the best book you read?
Ha! 20 textbooks, maybe? Okay, I really only got to read, like, 2 books this year. I read Kitchen Confidential and loved it. Also, another book in the Outlander series, Drums of Autumn. Mostly I read the NYT. Even then I usually only got through the Style section and the magazine.
26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
KCSM 91.1, the local jazz station. I just love the really mellow jazz they play from 6-9pm on weeknights.
27. What did you want and get?
To get through nursing school without losing my sanity. There were a few close calls. But also, I made some new friends. It helps make California feel more home-like when you have friends. Visits to the weekly farmers markets and if I couldn’t go, Michael did so we still got to eat really awesome fresh produce every week.
28. What did you want and not get?
Universal health care. A less effed up family. You can pick your nose and you can pick your friends but you can’t pick your family. Wait, I don’t think that’s how that’s supposed to go.
29. What was your favorite film of this year?
Nothing comes to mind. Well, I saw Spinal Tap again. But it goes to eleven.
30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I was 32 and I don’t remember. How sad.
31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Bountiful job offers at the end of school. Wow, I’m like a broken record here.
32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
White scrubs which I do NOT recommend.
33. What kept you sane?
My husband and my friends and coffee and flannel sheets and baking. There was a lot of stress baking.
34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Hugh Laurie and Stephen Colbert. I can’t help it.
38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.
Don’t sweat the small stuff. Seriously. Worry a little less. Try to keep things in perspective. Always realize that there’s more than one point of view. Perception is reality. Not to take it personally when a schizophrenic calls you a dirty whore.
39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
I’m never any good at this. I never download new music and I mostly listen to NPR. I don’t know…something, something, something, poker face.
As always, I'm late with posting so just ignore the fact that it's Feb. 2nd already. Technically, I started this on Jan. 10th.
1. What did you do in 2009 that you'd never done before?
Attended and graduated from an accelerated bachelors in nursing program. Learning that medicine has to have a special name for every bodily function. You can’t just say nose bleed you have to say “epistaxis.” Bed-wetting is “enuresis.” And gall bladder removal is “cholecystectomy.” I could go on and on about this but nursing school is pretty much all I did during 2009 so we’ll just leave it at that.
2. Did you keep your new year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
They were more like goals than resolutions but I met most of them. My container gardening experiment went south when the damned squirrels started digging up all my plants despite my efforts to fence everything in. Stupid squirrels. I did not manage to make bread from scratch until last weekend and I had a bit of a bread fail. I’ll work on that. And we did go to Hawaii for Christmas, so check!
I did make 2 resolutions for 2010: no talking on the cell phone while driving (not even with my ear bud) and doing less multi-tasking. I make myself nutty with too much multi-tasking so it’s time to cut back a bit.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Yes.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Yes. I don’t want to talk about it.
5. What countries did you visit?
None. Again. But that was expected this year. I did however go to Atlanta and Hawaii and I rather enjoyed myself. Besides, with Hawaii, it feels like you’re going to another county because it’s unlike anywhere in the contiguous U.S. Even Florida. Florida may have palm trees but it does not have huge blobs of lava rock everywhere.
6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
Um, a job? Hello, Universe, it’s me again. I’m unemployed. Again. I need a job. Preferably one in California, please. Also, more time to read. And I don’t just mean textbooks and nursing journals. More Sundays spent reading the NYT drinking coffee with my husband.
7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
There are many but in an attempt to focus on the more positive events, I’ll just note that 1/5/09 was the first day of school and 12/6/09 was my Pinning ceremony and 12/20/09 was my last day of preceptorship at the hospital.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
See #1.
9. What was your biggest failure?
Getting a B+ in Maternity. Ok, really, in the long run, not such a failure. That class was f’ing hard. In the beginning of the year, I had a hard time keeping grades and things in perspective. I started doing a better job of it in the fall. Maybe that had to do with the fact that I was tired of being in school and my can of care was running low.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
2 sinus infections and horrible neck spasms that rendered me pretty helpless while Michael was 2,000 miles away visiting his parents. That sucked.
11. What was the best thing you bought?
Underwear that fits. Brand new sneakers for the first time in 5 years. What was I thinking?
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Michael. He has been a total rock star and I could not have made it through this year without him. Or any year, for that matter. Because he’s awesome.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Well, we finally rid ourselves of Bush but his wrongdoings live on. Also, the Republicans and Joe Fcking Lieberman. Seriously, why are you trying to sabotage health care reform? What the hell is wrong with you?
14. Where did most of your money go?
Since I was unemployed, I did not make any money. :<
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Our vacation. It was long overdue.
16. What song will always remind you of 2009?
I don’t know. I’ll have to think about this one. Probably any song by Lady Gaga because she's always on the radio whenever I switch over to the music stations.
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? about the same
b) thinner or fatter? thinner
c) richer or poorer? I’m, like, negative poor. I’m in debt to the gov’t and the bank. Boo.
18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Leisurely reading but, hey, that was a pipe dream anyway. Unless I could suddenly learn to live on only 4 hours of sleep. Um, yoga. I really should have done more of that. Taking what blessedly few breaks from school that I had and really trying to relax instead of running a mile a minute to do life maintenance. Also, loving on my husband. And I don’t mean just the naked tango, people.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Freaking out about grades. Getting worked up by classmates who cheat because they won’t be able to cheat on the NCLEX. Good luck passing that one. And, as always, worrying. I worry about everything. It’s not always very helpful.
20. How will you be spending did you spend Christmas?
In Hawaii. We went on a walk down the coastline and watched the surfers for a bit. Later we went to a luau and had some pretty tasty food. The poi was okay. Pretty starchy. Also? Mai Tais are good. So is a well made pina colada.
23. What was your favorite TV program?
House. I love me some Hugh Laurie. Also, I particularly enjoy the Daily Show and the Colbert Report. It was easy to watch the occasional 21 min. show on the C C website without commercials. It was a nice little break from studying.
25. What was the best book you read?
Ha! 20 textbooks, maybe? Okay, I really only got to read, like, 2 books this year. I read Kitchen Confidential and loved it. Also, another book in the Outlander series, Drums of Autumn. Mostly I read the NYT. Even then I usually only got through the Style section and the magazine.
26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
KCSM 91.1, the local jazz station. I just love the really mellow jazz they play from 6-9pm on weeknights.
27. What did you want and get?
To get through nursing school without losing my sanity. There were a few close calls. But also, I made some new friends. It helps make California feel more home-like when you have friends. Visits to the weekly farmers markets and if I couldn’t go, Michael did so we still got to eat really awesome fresh produce every week.
28. What did you want and not get?
Universal health care. A less effed up family. You can pick your nose and you can pick your friends but you can’t pick your family. Wait, I don’t think that’s how that’s supposed to go.
29. What was your favorite film of this year?
Nothing comes to mind. Well, I saw Spinal Tap again. But it goes to eleven.
30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I was 32 and I don’t remember. How sad.
31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Bountiful job offers at the end of school. Wow, I’m like a broken record here.
32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
White scrubs which I do NOT recommend.
33. What kept you sane?
My husband and my friends and coffee and flannel sheets and baking. There was a lot of stress baking.
34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Hugh Laurie and Stephen Colbert. I can’t help it.
38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.
Don’t sweat the small stuff. Seriously. Worry a little less. Try to keep things in perspective. Always realize that there’s more than one point of view. Perception is reality. Not to take it personally when a schizophrenic calls you a dirty whore.
39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
I’m never any good at this. I never download new music and I mostly listen to NPR. I don’t know…something, something, something, poker face.
11.24.2009
ANXIETY!
Who doesn't have anxiety these days, right? But I have a new anxiety on the horizon and the endless surprise at the cause of my anxiety is giving me more anxiety.
My last day of school is less than one month from today. Good, right? Yes. And no. Yes, it's good that school is almost over. I'm very happy about this. But. Now this means that it's time to get that resume into shape and start applying for jobs. And this gives me anxiety because there are no jobs for new grads in California. Boo. Let me repeat that. There. Are. No. Jobs. For. New. Grads. In. California.
Seriously. This is not me be overly dramatic about an abysmal job market. It's for real. Everyone knows there's a nursing shortage, even here, but that doesn't change the fact that I'm looking outside of CA for job opportunities. And having to convince people that as a new grad I'm at the bottom of the applicant pool for jobs here grows wearisome. So! Carry on smartly, I must! Avoid typing in Yoda-speak, I must! I will be looking for new grad openings around the country, preferably on the West Coast but maybe somewhere near where you live. Didn't you say you wanted a roommate for a year?
For now, tho, I'm putting job stuff on the back burner. Until Dec. 20th, I still have school obligations so I'm not off the hook yet. Then I need to focus on the NCLEX. And theeeennnnnn, on jobs. In the meantime, all I want to do is bury my head in the sand and not come up until hospitals in this state realize that being penny-wise and pound-foolish is not a good long term strategy.
Who doesn't have anxiety these days, right? But I have a new anxiety on the horizon and the endless surprise at the cause of my anxiety is giving me more anxiety.
My last day of school is less than one month from today. Good, right? Yes. And no. Yes, it's good that school is almost over. I'm very happy about this. But. Now this means that it's time to get that resume into shape and start applying for jobs. And this gives me anxiety because there are no jobs for new grads in California. Boo. Let me repeat that. There. Are. No. Jobs. For. New. Grads. In. California.
Seriously. This is not me be overly dramatic about an abysmal job market. It's for real. Everyone knows there's a nursing shortage, even here, but that doesn't change the fact that I'm looking outside of CA for job opportunities. And having to convince people that as a new grad I'm at the bottom of the applicant pool for jobs here grows wearisome. So! Carry on smartly, I must! Avoid typing in Yoda-speak, I must! I will be looking for new grad openings around the country, preferably on the West Coast but maybe somewhere near where you live. Didn't you say you wanted a roommate for a year?
For now, tho, I'm putting job stuff on the back burner. Until Dec. 20th, I still have school obligations so I'm not off the hook yet. Then I need to focus on the NCLEX. And theeeennnnnn, on jobs. In the meantime, all I want to do is bury my head in the sand and not come up until hospitals in this state realize that being penny-wise and pound-foolish is not a good long term strategy.
11.10.2009
10.26.2009
Trying to take some time to smell the roses...
I'm a planner. I like to plan things. In advance. Like, way in advance sometimes. And I don't often take the time to enjoy what I'm doing, when I'm doing it where ever it is that I'm at (noooooooooo, don't end a sentence with a prepositional phrase!!!!). And when I'm overwhelmed by the amount of stuff I need to do and feel stressed, I plan even more and enjoy the moment a lot less.
But today I tried to stop and enjoy what beautiful NorCal weather we're having and the wind sweeping the fallen leaves through the streets and the smell of clean laundry and coffee crunch bar cookies baking in the oven. Oh, and perhaps most importantly, the tickle-y feeling of my husband lightly rubbing my feet. Love that. My house is tidied up and the dog is asleep in the "doggie doughnut" position and Michael and I are yuppy-ing it up on our laptops. He's checking out ESPN and I'm cruising the 10 or so cooking blogs that I've bookmarked. Right now I'm in the moment and it feels good.
I'm a planner. I like to plan things. In advance. Like, way in advance sometimes. And I don't often take the time to enjoy what I'm doing, when I'm doing it where ever it is that I'm at (noooooooooo, don't end a sentence with a prepositional phrase!!!!). And when I'm overwhelmed by the amount of stuff I need to do and feel stressed, I plan even more and enjoy the moment a lot less.
But today I tried to stop and enjoy what beautiful NorCal weather we're having and the wind sweeping the fallen leaves through the streets and the smell of clean laundry and coffee crunch bar cookies baking in the oven. Oh, and perhaps most importantly, the tickle-y feeling of my husband lightly rubbing my feet. Love that. My house is tidied up and the dog is asleep in the "doggie doughnut" position and Michael and I are yuppy-ing it up on our laptops. He's checking out ESPN and I'm cruising the 10 or so cooking blogs that I've bookmarked. Right now I'm in the moment and it feels good.
10.08.2009
Nothing but backwash in my can of care...
For those of you familiar with the origin of the "can of care" thing, my apologies. I do, however, I feel that it's apropos of the way I'm feeling right now. I am really struggling with staying on top of schoolwork what with the insane workload, prep for my exit exam, 2 out-of-town trips scheduled 2 weeks apart and home/life maintenance that has got to be done. You can only outsource and/or ignore so much stuff, you know?
This apathy is hard on me. I got B's on exams for two separate classes and, folks, I am NOT a B student. But apparently I am now. It wasn't for lack of studying, I just didn't retain the information. Also, I committed the cardinal sin of changing my answer after I had selected an appropriate response to the question. And I did it more than once. What the hell is wrong with me? I stopped myself from doing that back in March. Blarg. Before you say anything about grades not being that important, grades do matter when you know you're going to be one of 1,000 applicants for 15 slots at the only hospital in the Bay Area that is continuing its new grad hiring program. Boo. Also, taking ACLS (advanced cardiac life support) classes help but that's a whole weekend of studying and doing of homework down the tubes b/c now I'll be in this class. Plus it cost $225 (a discounted rate at that). Like I'm made of money or something. Or Michael since he's the one with the job. (Thanks, honey!) I better get a job, that's all I'm saying.
I keep telling myself that I will adjust my attitude and try to work harder/longer/sleep less/whatever the hell it takes to get through this but, man, am I tired. All I want to do is sleep. And you know, I haven't even been doing that much cooking. I cook, but I'm not trying out new recipes and I'm doing the cooking out of necessity rather than enjoyment. And that makes me sad because cooking is one of my favorite things to do. Especially since I got some seriously awesome birthday gifts in the form of cookbooks, ice cream makers and an immersion blender. We're talking about some serious kitchen loot and I've hardly touched it because I haven't had time. But as with all other things and the use of laxatives, this, too, shall pass. Not that I'm taking laxatives. Or that anyone needs to be. In fact, there are no laxatives here. Just forget I mentioned that part. Anyway, the light is at the end of the tunnel and there will be suntanning and fruity umbrella drinks when I get there. I am counting down the days.
For those of you familiar with the origin of the "can of care" thing, my apologies. I do, however, I feel that it's apropos of the way I'm feeling right now. I am really struggling with staying on top of schoolwork what with the insane workload, prep for my exit exam, 2 out-of-town trips scheduled 2 weeks apart and home/life maintenance that has got to be done. You can only outsource and/or ignore so much stuff, you know?
This apathy is hard on me. I got B's on exams for two separate classes and, folks, I am NOT a B student. But apparently I am now. It wasn't for lack of studying, I just didn't retain the information. Also, I committed the cardinal sin of changing my answer after I had selected an appropriate response to the question. And I did it more than once. What the hell is wrong with me? I stopped myself from doing that back in March. Blarg. Before you say anything about grades not being that important, grades do matter when you know you're going to be one of 1,000 applicants for 15 slots at the only hospital in the Bay Area that is continuing its new grad hiring program. Boo. Also, taking ACLS (advanced cardiac life support) classes help but that's a whole weekend of studying and doing of homework down the tubes b/c now I'll be in this class. Plus it cost $225 (a discounted rate at that). Like I'm made of money or something. Or Michael since he's the one with the job. (Thanks, honey!) I better get a job, that's all I'm saying.
I keep telling myself that I will adjust my attitude and try to work harder/longer/sleep less/whatever the hell it takes to get through this but, man, am I tired. All I want to do is sleep. And you know, I haven't even been doing that much cooking. I cook, but I'm not trying out new recipes and I'm doing the cooking out of necessity rather than enjoyment. And that makes me sad because cooking is one of my favorite things to do. Especially since I got some seriously awesome birthday gifts in the form of cookbooks, ice cream makers and an immersion blender. We're talking about some serious kitchen loot and I've hardly touched it because I haven't had time. But as with all other things and the use of laxatives, this, too, shall pass. Not that I'm taking laxatives. Or that anyone needs to be. In fact, there are no laxatives here. Just forget I mentioned that part. Anyway, the light is at the end of the tunnel and there will be suntanning and fruity umbrella drinks when I get there. I am counting down the days.
9.14.2009
There are times...
When I'm so frustrated with the administration at school and feel so utterly disenfranchised that I think I just can't bring myself to go back to campus or pick up a textbook. And I still feel that way for the most part. One of the faculty recently said that all students feel this way once they get over the hump and are just a few months from graduation. I remember feeling like I couldn't wait to be done with school that last time and I just kept saying "...finally, I'm finally going to be done" and I said it so often my mom had it piped onto my graduation cake. Thankfully, the person at the bakery was able to spell it correctly (I'm alluding to the cake my MIL brought to our rehearsal dinner that said simply "Tomorrow!" but the girl at the bakery could NOT, for the life of her, spell "tomorrow" without misspelling it. Repeatedly.)
But, today, I find myself feeling excited for the curriculum and for having had some really interesting experiences as a student. Right now we're doing simultaneous mental health and community health rotations and I'm really enjoying the mental health clinical portion. I'm sure I'll enjoy community health (home health and hospice rotation) but I don't start until tomorrow. Anyway, we have a lot of assignments for extra-curricular projects one of which is observing 2 self-help groups. We're supposed to do AA for one and then anything we want for the second one.
And I have to tell you, dear internets, that attending an AA meeting has to be one of the most interesting things I have ever done. It was absolutely fascinating. And the member were so friendly and welcoming. And they really do introduce themselves by saying "I'm Bob and I'm an alcoholic." And they celebrate anniversaries of sobriety. One member has been sober for 50 years, another 18 years and one 7 months. But everybody applauded these efforts no matter the length of time spent sober. They spent the meeting reading from the Big Book and everyone took turns reading a paragraph and then talking about what that paragraph meant to them. Or to make any other comment and it was humbling. The desperation, the struggle, the rock bottom-ness of it all was sad, inspirational, fascinating and surreal all at the same time. I'm glad I went. Thank you, SMU faculty, for assigning this project. I can't promise to try but I'll try to try to keep this in mind the next time I feel like I can't bring myself to go to campus.
When I'm so frustrated with the administration at school and feel so utterly disenfranchised that I think I just can't bring myself to go back to campus or pick up a textbook. And I still feel that way for the most part. One of the faculty recently said that all students feel this way once they get over the hump and are just a few months from graduation. I remember feeling like I couldn't wait to be done with school that last time and I just kept saying "...finally, I'm finally going to be done" and I said it so often my mom had it piped onto my graduation cake. Thankfully, the person at the bakery was able to spell it correctly (I'm alluding to the cake my MIL brought to our rehearsal dinner that said simply "Tomorrow!" but the girl at the bakery could NOT, for the life of her, spell "tomorrow" without misspelling it. Repeatedly.)
But, today, I find myself feeling excited for the curriculum and for having had some really interesting experiences as a student. Right now we're doing simultaneous mental health and community health rotations and I'm really enjoying the mental health clinical portion. I'm sure I'll enjoy community health (home health and hospice rotation) but I don't start until tomorrow. Anyway, we have a lot of assignments for extra-curricular projects one of which is observing 2 self-help groups. We're supposed to do AA for one and then anything we want for the second one.
And I have to tell you, dear internets, that attending an AA meeting has to be one of the most interesting things I have ever done. It was absolutely fascinating. And the member were so friendly and welcoming. And they really do introduce themselves by saying "I'm Bob and I'm an alcoholic." And they celebrate anniversaries of sobriety. One member has been sober for 50 years, another 18 years and one 7 months. But everybody applauded these efforts no matter the length of time spent sober. They spent the meeting reading from the Big Book and everyone took turns reading a paragraph and then talking about what that paragraph meant to them. Or to make any other comment and it was humbling. The desperation, the struggle, the rock bottom-ness of it all was sad, inspirational, fascinating and surreal all at the same time. I'm glad I went. Thank you, SMU faculty, for assigning this project. I can't promise to try but I'll try to try to keep this in mind the next time I feel like I can't bring myself to go to campus.
9.01.2009
Resolution update...
Remember these?
1. Make bread from scratch (no cheating with a bread machine)
2. Donate blood at least 4 times this year (can't do more it more than every 8 wks)
3. Try 3 new recipes every month
4. Do some container gardening...maybe some tomatoes, a pepper plant and some herbs?
5. Meet more of our neighbors besides just the couple next door
6. Do some sort of exercise (besides walking the dog) a minimum of 3 times a week
7. Try at least 3 new restaurants on Murphy Street (there's at least 12 and we eat at the same one every time)
8. Work on being more consistent with my tennis game
9. Hang pictures on the walls that do not feature any member of our families
10. Spend Christmas in Hawaii
11. Make this blog more aesthetically appealing (gotta have a stretch goal)
Well, since I'm so boring a lame and hardly ever post these days, I'm going to pinch hit here and give you a little update on my progress. I still haven't done #1 but then, it's been hot and we don't have air conditioning. I've spied Ina's recipe for Irish soda bread which is not, by the way, the same as the Irish bread we make every year during the holidays and whose recipe I cannot ever share with anyone (Great-Nana Breen's family secret) but I don't think that counts anyway. I'm thinking more like a really good honey whole wheat. Anyway, I'll get there.
Re: #2. Oh, hell, that's a funny story. So, I have given blood 2x so far this year and I just realized I'm due to go back but that's not the funny part. The funny part is how on June 24th, the last time I donated blood, I got pulled over for an incomplete stop at a stop sign because I got lost while trying to find the donation place. And the officer asked me where I was going and I told him "I'm going to give blood." Yeah, I'm sure he believed that one. And he goes off to write my ticket because CA is in a massive budget crunch in case you hadn't heard and do you know how much it was? $212. $212!!!!! For an incomplete stop! Fck. Anyway, it's time to give blood again and I have made damned sure that I have stopped for a full 3 seconds at every stop sign since and you can bet I'll be extra careful when I drive to my next appointment.
Re: #3, I'm right on track. You can head over here to see some of the tasty things I've made as well as the other fabulous recipes we've tried.
Re: #4, I'm only moderately successful here. My herbs are fine although the basils are going south for some unknown reason and the cilantro died before I could transplant it. My cherry tomatoes are starting to come in but I've only seen a handful of the green zebras. The heirlooms, well, that plant hasn't produced a thing. Durr. As for the pepper plant, it said bell pepper on the marker but they sure look like little banana peppers or something besides bell pepper. Better luck next year, I suppose.
Re: #5, we met 2 more neighbors and continue to introduce ourselves to other neighbors while out for walks. Regrettably, we weren't able to participate in the national "Night Out" this summer so we missed an opportunity to meet more neighbors.
Re: #6, well, I have that one in spades. I work out 5 times a week and sometimes as many as 7 times a week depending on my schedule. I'm a big fan of the "Biggest Loser" DVDs and I have 3 Jillian DVDs. Love them. I don't love that I pulled my triceps muscles this weekend when I upped the handweights to 8lbs but I do love that I recently purchased pants and a skirt with a single-digit size tag. I haven't seen that number in years. Years, people. So long ago, in fact, that I can't even remember the last time I bought something in that size. 9th grade or 10th grade, maybe?
Re: #7, we recently tried the 3rd new restaurant and it was pretty tasty.
Re: #8, as always, my tennis game is a work in progress. I've developed a strategy for beating Michael but with his enormous wingspan and my remaining placement inconsistencies, I'm successful only about half the time. I'm also working on my serve and am constantly struggling against the bad habit of backing up while following through with my swing. That's never a good strategy.
As for the rest, well, you can see I haven't touched #11. #10 won't happen until December and I really have no excuse for #9. We just need to spend some time framing a few photos and putting them up. How hard is that, anyway? And yet, it's still not done. It's all a work in progress, right?
Remember these?
1. Make bread from scratch (no cheating with a bread machine)
2. Donate blood at least 4 times this year (can't do more it more than every 8 wks)
3. Try 3 new recipes every month
4. Do some container gardening...maybe some tomatoes, a pepper plant and some herbs?
5. Meet more of our neighbors besides just the couple next door
6. Do some sort of exercise (besides walking the dog) a minimum of 3 times a week
7. Try at least 3 new restaurants on Murphy Street (there's at least 12 and we eat at the same one every time)
8. Work on being more consistent with my tennis game
9. Hang pictures on the walls that do not feature any member of our families
10. Spend Christmas in Hawaii
11. Make this blog more aesthetically appealing (gotta have a stretch goal)
Well, since I'm so boring a lame and hardly ever post these days, I'm going to pinch hit here and give you a little update on my progress. I still haven't done #1 but then, it's been hot and we don't have air conditioning. I've spied Ina's recipe for Irish soda bread which is not, by the way, the same as the Irish bread we make every year during the holidays and whose recipe I cannot ever share with anyone (Great-Nana Breen's family secret) but I don't think that counts anyway. I'm thinking more like a really good honey whole wheat. Anyway, I'll get there.
Re: #2. Oh, hell, that's a funny story. So, I have given blood 2x so far this year and I just realized I'm due to go back but that's not the funny part. The funny part is how on June 24th, the last time I donated blood, I got pulled over for an incomplete stop at a stop sign because I got lost while trying to find the donation place. And the officer asked me where I was going and I told him "I'm going to give blood." Yeah, I'm sure he believed that one. And he goes off to write my ticket because CA is in a massive budget crunch in case you hadn't heard and do you know how much it was? $212. $212!!!!! For an incomplete stop! Fck. Anyway, it's time to give blood again and I have made damned sure that I have stopped for a full 3 seconds at every stop sign since and you can bet I'll be extra careful when I drive to my next appointment.
Re: #3, I'm right on track. You can head over here to see some of the tasty things I've made as well as the other fabulous recipes we've tried.
Re: #4, I'm only moderately successful here. My herbs are fine although the basils are going south for some unknown reason and the cilantro died before I could transplant it. My cherry tomatoes are starting to come in but I've only seen a handful of the green zebras. The heirlooms, well, that plant hasn't produced a thing. Durr. As for the pepper plant, it said bell pepper on the marker but they sure look like little banana peppers or something besides bell pepper. Better luck next year, I suppose.
Re: #5, we met 2 more neighbors and continue to introduce ourselves to other neighbors while out for walks. Regrettably, we weren't able to participate in the national "Night Out" this summer so we missed an opportunity to meet more neighbors.
Re: #6, well, I have that one in spades. I work out 5 times a week and sometimes as many as 7 times a week depending on my schedule. I'm a big fan of the "Biggest Loser" DVDs and I have 3 Jillian DVDs. Love them. I don't love that I pulled my triceps muscles this weekend when I upped the handweights to 8lbs but I do love that I recently purchased pants and a skirt with a single-digit size tag. I haven't seen that number in years. Years, people. So long ago, in fact, that I can't even remember the last time I bought something in that size. 9th grade or 10th grade, maybe?
Re: #7, we recently tried the 3rd new restaurant and it was pretty tasty.
Re: #8, as always, my tennis game is a work in progress. I've developed a strategy for beating Michael but with his enormous wingspan and my remaining placement inconsistencies, I'm successful only about half the time. I'm also working on my serve and am constantly struggling against the bad habit of backing up while following through with my swing. That's never a good strategy.
As for the rest, well, you can see I haven't touched #11. #10 won't happen until December and I really have no excuse for #9. We just need to spend some time framing a few photos and putting them up. How hard is that, anyway? And yet, it's still not done. It's all a work in progress, right?
8.18.2009
That sucked...
I just took my critical care comprehensive final and it was, by far, the worst exam I've ever taken. I know I've said that before but, seriously, this one was the worst. So, to cheer myself up, I'm embarking upon some baking therapy and then I'm going to work out and then I'm sitting down to a nice mixed drink of vodka and blood orange soda over ice. I'm going to sit in my backyard and read the NYT and relax. Can't wait.
I just took my critical care comprehensive final and it was, by far, the worst exam I've ever taken. I know I've said that before but, seriously, this one was the worst. So, to cheer myself up, I'm embarking upon some baking therapy and then I'm going to work out and then I'm sitting down to a nice mixed drink of vodka and blood orange soda over ice. I'm going to sit in my backyard and read the NYT and relax. Can't wait.
7.29.2009
A visit with an old friend...
A book friend, that is. So, like a lot people I know, I read in bed before falling asleep. And before Michael can make a comment about how I fall asleep before reading 3 pages of anything, I'll just out myself right now. Since I can't stay awake long enough to read more than 3 pages, I usually read books that I've read before like Harry Potter or Calvin & Hobbes. But this time as I was perusing the book shelf, my eyes fell upon "Are You There God, It's Me, Margaret." What fun to reread that book, a book I have read a hundred times since 4th grade. It's the original book I purchased from the Little Professor bookstore that used to be next to Giant but then became the pizza place which then got bought out by Giant when they expanded in the late 80's. Not that you care about the bookstore or Giant.
Anyway, the book has a huge cherry KoolAid stain on it and is a bit dog eared from being so loved. It was fun and silly and I'm so glad I picked it up. I just love rereading some books; it truly is like visiting with an old friend. I'm also rereading "Island of the Blue Dolphins" which Mr. Paone read to us in 6th grade. Scott will probably remember that. Before that it was HP and the Half-Blood Prince. I'm not sure which book will be next (I can guarantee it won't be a new book until the end of August when I'm on break)...maybe some Little House books. I just looooooove the Little House books. Like, love so much that when I commented to a boyfriend that I wished I had a new set and was bummed that my parents didn't get it for me for X-mas he bought me a set. And then I kept it when he tore out my heart and squished it flat. Normally, I would have burned and/or thrown away such a gift but not the Little House books. That would be sacrilege. Just thinking about it makes me want to wander over to the bookshelf and pick up a book. I think I'll start from the beginning. Do you have favorite books that you like to reread?
A book friend, that is. So, like a lot people I know, I read in bed before falling asleep. And before Michael can make a comment about how I fall asleep before reading 3 pages of anything, I'll just out myself right now. Since I can't stay awake long enough to read more than 3 pages, I usually read books that I've read before like Harry Potter or Calvin & Hobbes. But this time as I was perusing the book shelf, my eyes fell upon "Are You There God, It's Me, Margaret." What fun to reread that book, a book I have read a hundred times since 4th grade. It's the original book I purchased from the Little Professor bookstore that used to be next to Giant but then became the pizza place which then got bought out by Giant when they expanded in the late 80's. Not that you care about the bookstore or Giant.
Anyway, the book has a huge cherry KoolAid stain on it and is a bit dog eared from being so loved. It was fun and silly and I'm so glad I picked it up. I just love rereading some books; it truly is like visiting with an old friend. I'm also rereading "Island of the Blue Dolphins" which Mr. Paone read to us in 6th grade. Scott will probably remember that. Before that it was HP and the Half-Blood Prince. I'm not sure which book will be next (I can guarantee it won't be a new book until the end of August when I'm on break)...maybe some Little House books. I just looooooove the Little House books. Like, love so much that when I commented to a boyfriend that I wished I had a new set and was bummed that my parents didn't get it for me for X-mas he bought me a set. And then I kept it when he tore out my heart and squished it flat. Normally, I would have burned and/or thrown away such a gift but not the Little House books. That would be sacrilege. Just thinking about it makes me want to wander over to the bookshelf and pick up a book. I think I'll start from the beginning. Do you have favorite books that you like to reread?
7.27.2009
I win!
My first patient on my first day back on the ward was positive for C. diff and had scabies. Woo! I swear to Ogg that I would bathe in Lysol if I could.
On a completely unrelated note, Michael and I have been trying to take advantage of some of the many things that sunny Kali-for-nee-ya has to offer such as the San Diego Zoo, the SF MoMA and the garlic festival. Pictures of a baby cheetah out on a walk with a zoo keeper and warthogs and camels will be forthcoming. I rather enjoyed our time at the zoo but perhaps the July 4th weekend was not the best time to partake of its offerings. The MoMA was great; we saw the Ansel Adams & Georgia O'Keeffe exhibit and loved it. Usually I find the audio tour to be quite helpful but not so much this time. And the garlic festival? Well, I'm pretty sure I still reek of garlic but since Michael probably does too and neither one of us can truly smell the other, well, I wouldn't come visit us for a couple of days. I doused myself in perfume this morning before going to class. But it was so worth it. See what you're missing by not living out here? Or at least visiting? (hint, hint, nudge, wink)
My first patient on my first day back on the ward was positive for C. diff and had scabies. Woo! I swear to Ogg that I would bathe in Lysol if I could.
On a completely unrelated note, Michael and I have been trying to take advantage of some of the many things that sunny Kali-for-nee-ya has to offer such as the San Diego Zoo, the SF MoMA and the garlic festival. Pictures of a baby cheetah out on a walk with a zoo keeper and warthogs and camels will be forthcoming. I rather enjoyed our time at the zoo but perhaps the July 4th weekend was not the best time to partake of its offerings. The MoMA was great; we saw the Ansel Adams & Georgia O'Keeffe exhibit and loved it. Usually I find the audio tour to be quite helpful but not so much this time. And the garlic festival? Well, I'm pretty sure I still reek of garlic but since Michael probably does too and neither one of us can truly smell the other, well, I wouldn't come visit us for a couple of days. I doused myself in perfume this morning before going to class. But it was so worth it. See what you're missing by not living out here? Or at least visiting? (hint, hint, nudge, wink)
7.22.2009
Where have I been...?
Apparently not hanging around here sharing the mundane details of my life. Thank goodness for a little respite, huh? Well, as always, I have been up to my eyeballs in homework and weekly quizzes and/or exams. You know, the usual. I've since finished my pediatrics rotation and the nursing research class (evidence-based practice is your friend. So are librarians, by the way, so make nice with all the librarians in your life) and am now on to critical care. We're not on a critical care unit the whole 5 weeks but will rotate in a few students at a time/day plus hopefully we'll get to spend some time in the ED, OR and some of us will go to the wound care clinic. I'd like to do that but I have a weekend rotation and wound care is only open M-F. Boo. All I can say is that I better see some good stuff because if I get stiffed again like I did in maternity I'm going to be seriously pissed off.
To sum up peds, all in all it was a good rotation. The hospital was great (location was sucky but we can't have everything, now can we?), staff were awesome, clinical instructor was mostly good but sometimes weird and, well, weird, and my group of classmates was pretty solid. Peds is an interesting place because they try to make the floor feel inviting to kids and their families and parents (mostly moms, tho) are pretty much camped out for the duration of their child's stay. Sadly, some kids don't have parents who can or will come and stay with them. Some parents don't have employers who are understanding and will fire them if they don't come back to work, some parents don't have a partner or a spouse to help out and may have other kids and home to take care of and some parents are absent for some other reason. I saw a fair number of kids who were in foster care because of neglect. I had one patient last week whose parents give consent over the phone for procedures but have nothing more to do with their daughter. She has a rare syndrome that causes developmental delays and she requires total care. Her parents put her in a home and have no contact with her. Her only visitors at the hospital have been 2 of the caregivers at the group home where she lives and they come to see her twice a week.
You know, it's hard to keep an open mind sometimes when it comes to other people's behavior. If I've learned nothing else while in nursing school, I've learned that you don't really know what people's lives are like outside of the hospital and you don't know what is going on that may interfere with their care for themselves or a family member. As a result, you can't be too quick to judge. But this girl's situation broke my heart. It is an unfortunate fact that some parents can't deal with a child who is "atypical" and this won't be the last time I encounter a situation like this.
On the other hand, there are some parents who are total rock stars and stay with their child for the duration of the treatment (sometimes for months at a time), who learn all about the diagnosis and treatments, who rally behind their child and support her/him all the while trying to hold their own shit together. It's an amazing thing to see and I think it's what I'll miss most about pediatrics. But for now, it's back to adults and all the challenges that come with treating them. I'm hopeful that this will be a good rotation.
Apparently not hanging around here sharing the mundane details of my life. Thank goodness for a little respite, huh? Well, as always, I have been up to my eyeballs in homework and weekly quizzes and/or exams. You know, the usual. I've since finished my pediatrics rotation and the nursing research class (evidence-based practice is your friend. So are librarians, by the way, so make nice with all the librarians in your life) and am now on to critical care. We're not on a critical care unit the whole 5 weeks but will rotate in a few students at a time/day plus hopefully we'll get to spend some time in the ED, OR and some of us will go to the wound care clinic. I'd like to do that but I have a weekend rotation and wound care is only open M-F. Boo. All I can say is that I better see some good stuff because if I get stiffed again like I did in maternity I'm going to be seriously pissed off.
To sum up peds, all in all it was a good rotation. The hospital was great (location was sucky but we can't have everything, now can we?), staff were awesome, clinical instructor was mostly good but sometimes weird and, well, weird, and my group of classmates was pretty solid. Peds is an interesting place because they try to make the floor feel inviting to kids and their families and parents (mostly moms, tho) are pretty much camped out for the duration of their child's stay. Sadly, some kids don't have parents who can or will come and stay with them. Some parents don't have employers who are understanding and will fire them if they don't come back to work, some parents don't have a partner or a spouse to help out and may have other kids and home to take care of and some parents are absent for some other reason. I saw a fair number of kids who were in foster care because of neglect. I had one patient last week whose parents give consent over the phone for procedures but have nothing more to do with their daughter. She has a rare syndrome that causes developmental delays and she requires total care. Her parents put her in a home and have no contact with her. Her only visitors at the hospital have been 2 of the caregivers at the group home where she lives and they come to see her twice a week.
You know, it's hard to keep an open mind sometimes when it comes to other people's behavior. If I've learned nothing else while in nursing school, I've learned that you don't really know what people's lives are like outside of the hospital and you don't know what is going on that may interfere with their care for themselves or a family member. As a result, you can't be too quick to judge. But this girl's situation broke my heart. It is an unfortunate fact that some parents can't deal with a child who is "atypical" and this won't be the last time I encounter a situation like this.
On the other hand, there are some parents who are total rock stars and stay with their child for the duration of the treatment (sometimes for months at a time), who learn all about the diagnosis and treatments, who rally behind their child and support her/him all the while trying to hold their own shit together. It's an amazing thing to see and I think it's what I'll miss most about pediatrics. But for now, it's back to adults and all the challenges that come with treating them. I'm hopeful that this will be a good rotation.
6.30.2009
Hater...part II
Wow, straight off of the whole financial aid pain-in-the-ass-ness and here I am being subjected to automated call center hell just so I can make an effing doctor's appt. Whatever happened to just calling the doctor's office and making an appt. with a human being and being off the phone in, at most, 2 minutes? Gah. I hate everything.
8 minutes and 37 seconds later I have made an appt. It seems like sometimes advancing technology creates more work and takes more time to complete a task than just putting a schedule book in the hand of a single human being at the other end of the line. Durr.
Tomorrow I'll find something nice and wholesome to say about, I don't know...something.
Wow, straight off of the whole financial aid pain-in-the-ass-ness and here I am being subjected to automated call center hell just so I can make an effing doctor's appt. Whatever happened to just calling the doctor's office and making an appt. with a human being and being off the phone in, at most, 2 minutes? Gah. I hate everything.
8 minutes and 37 seconds later I have made an appt. It seems like sometimes advancing technology creates more work and takes more time to complete a task than just putting a schedule book in the hand of a single human being at the other end of the line. Durr.
Tomorrow I'll find something nice and wholesome to say about, I don't know...something.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)